Thursday, August 15, 2019

THE ORPHAN SCRIVENER -- ISSUE # ONE HUNDRED AND EIGHTEEN -- 15 AUGUST 2019

Having consulted experts, we should like to remind our subscribers that August 15th is officially National Lemon Meringue Pie Day. Hopefully this edition of Orphan Scrivener will not turn out to be a lemon...


ERIC'S BIT or CAPTAIN AT THE SWITCHBOARD

In his later years my grandfather worked as a custodian at the local phone company. I'd pass the big brick building every day on my way home from grade school. He used to let me in after closing time. I followed him down the deserted hallways to the closet by the dark stairwell where he put away his mop and bucket. I felt like an adventurer journeying through forbidden regions.

We'd stop by the echoing cafeteria for a soda from the machine, and then visit Mabel, the switchboard operator. This black, light-studded panel wasn't the switchboard for the building, but for the whole town. How many local dialers had been privileged to glimpse the jolly gray- haired lady who sat at the secret heart of their every phone conversation, calmly plugging and unplugging connections as green and yellow cats-eyes flashed amid the crossed cords?

More amazing still, Mabel allowed me to sit in her big soft leather swivel chair, don the headset, take plugs in hand, and assume her duties for a few minutes. It was like sitting in front of the control panel of a spaceship.

And just as if I really were a spaceship captain, I could perform futuristic feats, like placing three-way calls. They were unheard of back then, at least by me and my friends. Imagine their shock and delight when they realized the three of us really were speaking to each other, all at once, from different places. Telephones just couldn't do that, any more than they could transmit pictures or send you backwards in time, at least not twentieth century phones. It was incredible, impossible, downright science fictional!

But before I did anything, my grandfather always pointed out a large red light that glowed steadily beside a socket near the bottom of the board. "Just make sure you don't put the plug in there. That goes straight to the owner. If you ring up the owner at home, we'll be in a powerful lot of trouble."

Of course, there's nothing like a hint of danger to make a task more exciting. I worked around that red light pretty carefully.

Years later, after my grandfather was gone, when I realized he'd had a dry sense of humor, I figured he must have been kidding. But I never plugged in there so I'll never know.


NECESSARY EVIL or THE BSP TICKER This time around the ticker is taking a bit of a rest while undergoing maintenance, but it has still produced an item to print out on its paper tape...and here it is.

How are plot ideas inspired? On July 3rd we revealed what sparked five of our works in an essay for Lois Winston's Anastasia Pollock blog.

https://anastasiapollack.blogspot.com/2019/07/mary-reed-and-eric-mayer-dig-into-past.html

Our thanks to Lois for the opportunity to do something we don't do often: talking about the mechanics of writing.


MARY'S BIT or CREATING ILLUSIONS WITHOUT TURTLES

It has been said much of what the unlearned regard as magical involves secrets of art and nature. Of late we've been watching Penn and Teller's Fool Us series, in which magician guests attempt hoodwink the duo. Being among the unlearned, we marvel at the prestidigitation thus presented, turning to each other in amazement, exclaiming how did they *do* that?

Just as fascinating are Penn's coded comments, conveying to guests the methods by which their tricks were accomplished. Occasionally they are indeed fooled and a trophy is awarded. To the layperson these comments are as mysterious as the tricks, so we also routinely ask each other a second question: what does he *mean* by that?

We assume this speaking in code is to keep the secret of the execution of the trick as a professional courtesy to a fellow illusionist. A prime example of this technical jargon cropped up a couple of evenings ago and nagged me for an explanation ever since: Penn mentioned turtles more than once. So I've consulted that universal know-it-all Mr Google for the answer.

Before revealing what I learned, I shall proceed to astonish subscribers by reading their minds, using my own newly invented magic trick. And yes, I really did just think it up.

Ready? Think of a turtle, a nice little turtle. Focus your thoughts hard on your turtle. Handsome little devil, isn't he, as he crawls along carrying his abode on his back? And what is your turtle doing now? Think your reply but say nothing for I shall tell you: your turtle is drawing its head inside its shell!

If I was wrong and subscribers feel they have reason to express dissatisfaction, please direct all grievances to Mr Maywrite, currently wearing the Orphan Scrivener Complaints Manager hat.

Back to the magical turtles. They're hollow coins, which is to say the shells of same, and thus a most useful accessory for performing any number of tricks.

If we may be so bold, as writers we're akin to our diminutive Egyptian magician Dedi who played a major role in Six For Gold and Ten For Dying inasmuch as we're in the business of creating illusions -- only we employ words instead of turtles.


AND FINALLY

As usual we close by reminding subscribers that, courtesy of the seemingly magical system we know as the intertubez, we shall reappear in subscribers' in-boxes on October 15th.

See you then!
Mary R & Eric

who invite you to visit their home page, to be found hanging out on the virtual washing line that is the Web at http://reedmayermysteries.000webhostapp.com/ There you'll discover the usual suspects, including more personal essays, a bibliography, and our growing libraries of links to free e-texts of classic and Golden Age mysteries, ghost stories, and tales of the supernatural. It also hosts the Orphan Scrivener archive, so don't say you weren't warned! Meantime, our joint blog, largely devoted to reviews of Golden Age of Mystery fiction, lurks about at http://ericreedmysteries.blogspot.com/ Intrepid subscribers may also wish to know our noms des Twitter are @marymaywrite and @groggytales. Drop in some time.


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